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I’ve never gone to a Barnard reunion… have you?
I’ve never gone to a Barnard reunion… have you?
I’m going this year though.
I must admit: I mixed feelings about reunion because so much of what was ingrained in us at Barnard was to be successful. Perhaps I also focused so hard on my success to make up for all my partying. I’ll have to ask my shrink. In any event: Over the past fourteen years, I’ve done a lot of stuff work wise that I’m really proud of. But then toward the end of last year as I was renewing my contract at the last magazine I was Editor of (Seventeen), I had a major epiphany: I hadn’t accomplished anything in my personal life that I was proud of. Sure, I got married to a wonderful guy (Ari!) when I was 26. But then two months later I was named Editor in Chief of CosmoGIRL! and all personal progress stopped. 10 years of marriage and I couldn’t imagine having kids. Our apartment was barely furnished and I’d spend vacations just trying to thaw out on the beach like a bug-eyed zombie.
Though I’m really proud of my decision to leave my career and put the same amount of effort into my personal life (I’m now pregnant, living in a new apartment and so happy in my marriage thank God!), there’s a part of me that’s thinking: What am I going to say at reunion? That I’m retired?? This just isn’t how I pictured it. Plus I’m going to be the size of a house. Who doesn’t want to look cute and impossibly successful at reunion???
But then I remind myself (are these blogs turning into therapy sessions? I’m going to work on that — sorry!) I live my life to please myself now — not for the audience.
My challenge for reunion: I have to figure out a good one-line answer for: “Hey! What are you doing now?” Any suggestions are appreciated because I know I’m not alone in my decisions.
So how are YOU feeling about reunion?? I’d love to hear.
xx
atoosa
Atoosa,
Your snappy one line answer to the question is, “I making feet.”"
i am now 50 and had my epiphany when i was 48! the key is this:when we are all sitting around in our wheelchairs what will we look back upon? i am a physician and honored that i have had the opportunity to help thousands of people. now, it is time to be a bit selfish and spend time with my family before they all leave the nest. you owe no explanations! we were brought up that we could do anything and everything. you know that is impossible,without sacrifices. we are all phenomenally capable women but something does get sacrificed. our family life! it is fine for those who are comfortable with that. many of us do not wish to miss out on the phenomenal moments our kids and spouses have to offer…so we find compromises that suit our hearts, soul and conscience…not easy because we all feel guilty and ashamed at times..you will be able to find the perfect balance and learn to be proud…barnard gave us the most important gift; the gift of a choice!
good luck, be healthy and enjoy all life has to offer!
ruth
Miss Alpha Kitty,
I have always admired what you accomplished at such a young age. You made an enormous impact on so many young women’s lives. What a great personal achievement!!
I always felt that I took the easy way out after graduation by going into finance. As Ruth just said, “…barnard gave us the most important gift; the gift of a choice!” I chose to take a risk and leave my career without any backup plan when I was 34. Now I have my own small business. Will I change the world? Probably not. But I am thrilled that I took the risk to become a happier individual.
I will see you at the reunion. 15 YEARS!!
Hi Atoosa-
I’m responding to you- but hi to Ruby as well! I think it’s always a bit nerve racking when going back to a reunion- but I am confident that we all have been able to make our mark in the world one way or another- and there is so much more to come! It’s only been 15 years, and I always love highlighting my fellow Barnard grads’ accomplishments. You are not necessarily retired- just “on a break.” Everything has it’s time- now take care of you, your hubby, and your soon to be new family! I have 4 of my own, and I have a career, but something has to give- you can’t be the best mom and the best career woman AT THE SAME TIME- and it’s ok. Now’s the time to be mommy- Enjoy, and looking forward to seeing you all…
I went to my first Barnard reunion last year after twenty-five years. I had such a good time. Of course anyone is nervous to see and hear experiences and success stories and a certain amount of apprehension will be there. What struck me was the feeling I had when I set foot in front of Barnard Hall through those gates and realized the tingling was there because I was happy to be back and probably stayed away too long. All the tension left after that and I didn’t care whether my story was more appealing than anyone else’s. I was someplace I truly belonged and was a great deal responsible for creating the person that I now am. The joy was amazing. I hope you have that experience too because in the end we are the only ones who can make ourselves happy. Barnard taught me that too. I’ll be there Saturday.Hope to see you.KIB
Barnard reunion i good time yes.
einige gute Punkte in Funktionen auch.